


Trapped

by palejewel



Category: Firefly
Genre: Age Difference, Drinking, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Flirting, F/M, Size Difference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-09
Updated: 2018-02-09
Packaged: 2019-03-15 18:59:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13619658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/palejewel/pseuds/palejewel
Summary: When Jayne and River find themselves trapped in the engine room with Kaylee's homemade wine, they decide to pass the time with a little game.





	1. One

Things were not going as planned.

River was perched on the edge of Kaylee’s hammock in the engine room. Jayne was pacing, which was difficult because the engine room wasn’t exactly spacious, and Jayne was, as usual, heavily armed. His chest was bare and streaked with blood.

“Each hand contains twenty six bones,” River said, gazing at her own hand, smudged with engine grease. “The scaphoid, the lunate, the triquetrum, the pisiform, the trapezium, the hamate, the capitate…”

“Will you shut that crazy mouth?” Jayne said sharply. River shut her mouth with a snap and glared at him.

“You’re ruining the fun,” she said, and stuck out her tongue.

“You’re ruining the…thinking,” Jayne said, grasping for an intelligent reply and coming up short. Jayne actually was thinking—or trying to. In most situations, he could just shoot first and ask questions later. When he needed brains, Mal was there to tell him who to shoot, and when. Jayne was never the mastermind. But what was he going to shoot here—the door?

“The proximal, middle and distal phalanges,” River muttered, and Jayne exhaled slowly through clenched teeth. The girl? He could shoot the girl. It might at least make it easier to think.

“The flexor retinaculum and the palmar aponeurosis,” River added, sounding pleased with herself.

…He couldn’t shoot the girl, he was trapped in this gorramn room to protect the girl. That crazy, moonbrained, maddening little creature who didn’t seem to understand the situation. Situation.

_“We have a situation, Wash,” Mal was saying into the handset as he and Jayne carried Zoe, one of her arms over each of their shoulders, barely conscious. “Just get Serenity ready to fly.”_

_“Did you find Inara?” Wash’s voice came over the speaker, tinny and staticky._

_“Not yet,” Mal replied shortly, “but we will.”_

_“We can’t leave without her,” Kaylee’s voice came from the speaker, distant. She sounded frantic._

_“We won’t, little Kaylee. Don’t worry,” Mal assured her, but his face was like stone. Zoe’s head lolled to one side. Her breathing was labored and the wound in her stomach was still bleeding, despite Jayne’s shirt wrapped around it as tightly as they could tie it._

_“What’s the situation?” Wash said suddenly, as though just realizing what Mal meant. “What happened? Did you run into the feds?”_

_“No, just the Priestess,” Mal said tiredly, but Wash pressed on._

_“What’s wrong? Is Zoe hurt?”_

_There was silence on the line and Mal’s lips tightened into a thin line as he waited for Wash to understand what he didn’t want to say._

_“Oh, chou ma-niao,” Wash whispered._

_“Just get her ready to fly,” Mal said shortly, and that was the end of the conversation. Jayne and Mal carried Zoe in silence, Mal because it was his custom, and Jayne because he couldn’t think of anything to say._

“Phalanges are also the toes,” River said, looking straight at Jayne as though instructing him. As though he cared.

“Hey, genius, why don’t you set that pretty brain of yours to work on figurin’ how to get us out of here, instead of reciting your science lessons?” Jayne snapped, taking a step towards her in a way that made even the sturdiest of men flinch. River didn’t even blink. She held his gaze, those wide brown eyes perfectly calm.

She reached one hand out, delicate, slender fingers outstretched. Her fingertips brushed over his bare chest, dark with hair, streaked with Zoe’s dried blood. For a moment he wondered what she was thinking. Was it curiosity? Had she seen another chest other than her brother’s—hairless, boyish? Was it regret? Did she see the scar, the one she’d left, nestled amongst the maze of his other scars, and wonder why she’d cut him? He looks better in red, she’d said defiantly, even after he’d struck her.

She’d crouched there on the floor, hair hanging over her eyes, split lip marring that doll-like face. He’d somehow felt a tinge of remorse through his anger. She looked so fragile.

River's fingertips traced trails of ice down his chest. He shivered. His hand shot out to catch hers, to reprimand her, to get her to talk sense and help him—she was smart enough, wasn’t she?—but she had pulled away, tucking both her hands behind her back and beaming up at him.

“Too slow,” she mocked him. Too slow.

_“Hurry up, Doctor,” Mal said tightly, his jaw clenched._

_“But River—” Simon had said, one hand possessively on his sister’s arm. She was staring unnervingly at Zoe as Jayne lowered her onto the infirmary bed, Wash hovering nearby and wringing his hands._

_“Zoe, baby, Zoe, you’re gonna be okay,” Wash was saying over and over to his unconscious wife._

_“Jayne,” Mal had said. “Take River to the kitchen and keep her safe. I’ll be right there.”_

_“Why me?” Jayne asked, aware that he was being childish, and not caring._

_“Because,” Mal said darkly, turning to Jayne with eyes like chips of ice, “Somebody needs to keep her out of trouble, and you are the only somebody with nothing to do right now.” Jayne heard what Mal wasn’t saying: it’s your fault Zoe got shot. Inara is too important for me to let you mess anything else up._

_“Gorramnit, Mal, it wasn’t my fault,” Jayne said. “We just crossed signals, is all. I thought she was going left.”_

_Mal put a hand on Wash’s shoulder and mentioned something about ‘letting the doctor work.’ Jayne had realized that he didn’t really have much of a choice._

_“C’mon, crazy,” he’d said, and had headed for the kitchen without checking to see if River was behind him._

“It’s locked from the outside,” River said calmly.

“What is?” He asked, still vaguely confused about the subject of conversation. It was changing too quickly for him to keep up.

“The engine room,” River said slowly, as though speaking to a child. “The engine room is locked from the outside. There is no way for us to get out unless someone lets us out.”

“Oh, come on,” Jayne said helplessly, “You’re a genius. Can’t you figure a way out of here?”

“Other than creating a blow torch and welding through the hull,” River said, “our only option is waiting for Mal to come back and unlock the door.”

Jayne punched the metal door hard enough that it rang in the small room, even over the low rumble of the engine. River winced, but Jayne didn’t notice the pain. A metal door wasn’t so much harder than a man’s face, after all.

“Useless,” River commented quietly, staring at the floor.

“Then tell me, what should I be doing? Praying? Sittin’ down and waiting? Singin’ a little song to pass the time?” River smiled at that thought.

“You want to sing?” River teased, that little half-smile still on her lips, and Jayne tore his gaze away from her and glared out the little window in the door. There was no movement in the hall.

“Jaa-aayne,” River sang softly, “The man they call Jaa-aayne…”

“Stop it,” Jayne said sharply, spinning around and narrowing his eyes at her. “Stop it. Stop singin’ that.”

“Oh, he robbed from the rich and he gave to the poor, stood up to the man and he gave him what-for, our love for him now—”

“Stop it!” Jayne growled, stepping towards her as though he would strike her.

“—ain’t hard to explain, the hero of Canton, the man they caa-aall—”

She stopped singing immediately as he cocked his gun, leveling it at her head.

“I said stop it,” Jayne said in a low voice. “I don’t want to hear that ruttin’ song. Stop your singing and shut up, or figure a way out of here, or your squeaky little voice is gonna get me so on-edge that I’m gonna shoot you for real.” River stared at him unblinkingly. He lowered the gun, reholstering it.

“…Jaa-aayne.” River finished softly.

Jayne raised a hand and she shrank back from it, remembering when he’d hit her before. For some reason this affected him more than anything that had happened that day, more even than Zoe getting shot. People getting shot, that happened all the time, what with the work they did. It was bad, it was dangerous, but it was nothing new. This, though—River fearing not his gun but his hand—that struck him.

“Finished now?” Jayne grumbled, lowering his hand. Finished now?

_“We have to finish this. Now,” Mal said. “We don’t have time for this. If we keep movin’ so slowly, more’n Zoe’s gonna get hurt. We have to act before the Feds get here.”_

_“Let’s go then,” Jayne said firmly, “Let’s go get Inara and get off this rock.” Mal shook his head, so subtly that Jayne almost missed it. “No? But you just said, we have to finish it!”_

_“Jayne, you need to stay here. With River.”_

_“Stay—! Daxiang baozhashi de la duzi…Mal, I’m a mercenary! I’m a fighter! I’m not a babysitter!” Mal turned towards Jayne with that steel in his eyes, the glimmer that said ‘don’t challenge me right now.’_

_“Jayne, I need someone to keep tabs on her, because we need our doctor to be able to focus on Zoe, and we don’t need any more reasons for this to go wrong.”_

_Jayne knew the mention of Zoe’s injury was aimed to make him feel guilty. He didn’t. Zoe was a fighter, same as him. Accidents happen. She knew that._

_“Leave Kaylee with her, Mal, you know she’s no good with a gun, she won’t be able to help you.”_

_“Kaylee can’t handle River. We all know Kaylee couldn’t stop a kitten from leaving the room if that kitten looked at her sad enough. 'Sides, I need Kaylee focused in the engine room. We’re gonna have to make a fast getaway and if the black smoke that accompanied our landing is anything to go by, we’re gonna be lucky to even get off the ground. We’re gonna have Feds all over us in just short of…soon.”_

_Mal holstered his gun, face grim. “Take her back to the engine room and you two stay with Kaylee. And Jayne, if you leave that girl’s side…”_

_“Yeah, yeah, I got it,” Jayne grumbled. He stomped off to the engine room and River followed with her dancer’s grace, bare feet silent on the metal grates._


	2. Two

_“Is she in your way, Kaylee? Is she botherin’ you? I don’t want you distracted when our lives are on the line here, and if she’s distractin’ you, I’d be more’n happy to get her out of the way, ‘cause—”_

_“Jayne,” Kaylee interrupted, not moving her eyes from the engine in front of her, one hand busily working a wrench._

_“Yeah?” Jayne said. His hands were hovering near his hip holsters, as though he suspected something would jump out and shoot at them. It was a nervous habit, and Kaylee knew it._

_“Shut up,” Kaylee said kindly._

_With a huff, Jayne turned around and started pacing. He glanced out the engine room doors and then turned back toward the girls._

_“C’mon, Kaylee, can’t I just lock you two in here for safekeepin’ and go out and help ‘em? Vera’s itching for some action.”_

_“You heard the Cap’n, Jayne, he wanted you to stay here. Anyway, we need your…strong, manly protection.” River’s mouth twitched into a half smile at this little jab, but Jayne seemed to think Kaylee was being serious, and it did little to calm him._

_“They need my strong, manly help out there! With Zoe out, Mal’s the only good fighter we got!”_

_“The Cap’n said for you to stay here, and I don’t want to get shot again just because you decided you needed to perform some thrilling heroics,” Kaylee said calmly, still not looking up from her work. “Now you just stay here with us while I get Serenity up-and-running so we can get off this rock.”_

_Jayne snorted, but the memory of Kaylee getting shot when that Alliance agent got twitchy made him stay. He’d never felt so sick to his stomach as he did waiting outside the infirmary for news of her._

_“Work fast,” Jayne said._

“You know—” River began quietly, and Jayne spun around to glare at her, teeth clenched.

“If you’re about to start spoutin’ more of your nonsense, you best reconsider, because I am most definitely not in the mood for it.”

“—pacing won’t do you any good,” River finished as though he hadn’t even interrupted her.

“According to you, little miss genius, nothing will do me any good. Better pacing than just sittin’ around.”

“We could play a game,” River suggested, and slid off of the hammock. She held out her hands, palms down. “Put your hands there—” she reached down to pull his hands into position, palm up, under hers, and Jayne pulled away with a little too much force. She stumbled and regained her balance, laughing as though he were playing.

Jayne glared. “Stop that. I don’t know what you’re tryin’ to pull, but I ain’t forgettin’ you slashing my chest open with a kitchen knife.” River took a step back and looked almost repentant.

“Never?” River prodded. “You’ll never forgive it?”

“I don’t forgive,” Jayne said gruffly, but she was making him uncomfortable with her stare and he looked away. He made as if to start pacing again and felt a small hand work its way into his.

“Don’t,” River said, and he turned and met her eyes unwillingly. “You’re gonna make me nervous,” she said with that bright, off-putting grin. Her hand still locked in his, she took a step closer to him.

Jayne jerked his hand from her grip, a surprisingly difficult task for her being such a slip of a girl, and before he knew it his hand was on his knife hilt and he’d taken a few involuntary steps back, legs spread in the defensive position. River gave a carefree laugh that rang like bells on the metal walls of the engine room.

It was, Jayne had to agree with the bounty hunter of a few months before, ‘unsettling.’

“Listen,” he said, not quite sure what he was going to say to her, but only sure that he needed to smash that playful mood before she made him crazy. Listen.

_“Listen,” River said silently, suddenly still, eyes wide. Kaylee stopped turning her wrench and listened obediently. Jayne’s hand went to the hilt of his gun. A loud crash echoed down the hallway, and Kaylee flinched. River didn’t move._

_“What the hell-” Jayne began, but River held up one hand, imperious, and he fell grudgingly silent._

_“They’re coming.”_

_“Who’s coming?” Kaylee asked._

_“Is it Reavers?” Jayne said, and he pulled his gun out of its holster. “If it’s Reavers…gorramit, if it’s Reavers—”_

_“Not Reavers,” River said impatiently, waving a hand at him to shut him up. “The Captain.” Indeed, the Captain and Simon came barreling down the corridor, shouting at each other._

_“I want her with me!” Simon said firmly, but Mal was disagreeing even as he walked._

_“The infirmary isn’t safe, Simon, I’m only letting you stay there because Zoe can’t be moved. Trust me—” Mal said, and Simon interrupted, throwing his hands in the air._

_“Trust you?! Why the hell should I trust you? You got us into this whole mess!”_

_“Trust me,” Mal repeated in a low voice, “She will be safer with Jayne in the engine room.”_

_“Wo cao ni ba bei zi zu zong, Cap’n, you ain’t gonna take me out there?” Jayne said._

_“Jayne, I need you to take care of the girl. Now, I’m gonna lock you two in…”_

_“Lock us in?! Captain, come on! If you’re gonna lock us in, lock her in by herself! Why do I need to be here?”_

_“So she doesn’t get herself into trouble. This is the gorramn heart of my ship and I don’t want her messin’ with it.” Mal was growing impatient. “Don’t make the mistake of thinking this is a request, Jayne,” he warned._

_“If that’s all you need, lock Kaylee in here with the crazy girl!”_

_“I need Kaylee to come with me. We need the mule to run for our genius plan, and it’s havin’ trouble. If we get stranded out there on the mule, everyone’s dead. Jayne, I don’t have time for this argument.”_

_Mal grabbed Kaylee’s arm and pulled her with him out the door of the engine room. Simon had been saying something to River. Mal caught his eye and raised his eyebrows—‘let’s go’—and Simon ended his sentence with ‘...and if he touches you, go ahead and hurt him’ and then followed Mal out the door._

_“Stay. Here,” Mal said darkly, and Jayne just stared helplessly as Mal shut the door and he heard the sound of the locks engaging._

_Jayne looked at River. River looked at Jayne._

_“Each hand contains twenty six bones.”_

“Listen,” Jayne repeated unsteadily, “How about you just sit there on that hammock and try and use your reader powers to figure out what this _yu bun duh_ plan is so you can tell me how long it’s gonna take.”

River stuck out her tongue and crossed her arms. Despite their years together on the ship, despite River's odd vacillation between whimsical childishness and unsettling wisdom, never had Jayne been more aware that he was technically dealing with a teenager. He took a calming breath. It didn’t work.

“Well if you’re not going to do anything useful,” he said through gritted teeth, “Just sit down and be quiet and leave me to my pacin’.”

“No,” River said easily in reply, arms still folded over her chest. Jayne turned back to stare at her, incredulous.

“What did you say?”

River quirked an eyebrow. Jayne glared back, trying to appear angrier than he really felt. Mostly he just felt confused, and irritated. He wasn’t used to people ignoring his threats, especially not little girls.

“Then what,” Jayne said, “do you plan on doing?”

“What do you like to do in your spare time?” River asked, ignoring his question. “What are your hobbies?” When Jayne didn’t reply, she spoke for him. “Guns. Cleaning guns. Owning guns. Buying guns. Using guns. Money. Earning money. Taking money. Spending money. Women. F-”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jayne interrupted, alarmed. “I get it, yeah, okay.”

“You have guns,” River said. “You could clean them, but you don’t have your kit. Plus, you wouldn’t want to be caught off guard. You could use them, but you’d either have to shoot me or yourself. You’d never shoot yourself, and I’d prefer if you didn’t shoot me.”

“Can’t shoot you,” Jayne allowed grudgingly, “Captain’d kill me.”

“Can’t earn money, can’t take money, can’t spend money. Trapped,” River went on methodically.

“Women—” River trailed off, and then glanced around the engine room as though checking to see if there were any loose women tucked onto nearby shelves. “No women. Only girls. One girl.”

Jayne watched her uncomfortably. What was she saying?

“Jayne won’t lie with girls,” River said matter-of-factly. “Jayne is a decent man.”

“Am not,” Jayne said immediately, defensive. He wasn’t going to stand by while somebody called him decent.

“Are too,” River retorted immediately, taking a step towards him.

“Am not.”

“Prove it,” River said quickly, and Jayne opened his mouth to respond and then froze, unsure.

“What are you tryin’ to say? You tryin’ to seduce me, girl?”

River laughed again, that whimsical laugh.

“Only talking,” River said, “Passing time.”

Jayne shook his head, thoroughly confused. “Go sit in yer hammock,” he said, and, to his great surprise, she did. Wordlessly, she perched herself again on the edge and watched him. Eerie as hell, Jayne thought, and forced himself to peer out the window into the hallway again. Still empty. It was going to be a long day.


	3. Three

Jayne had finally taken a seat near the door, still twitchy but having decided that pacing wasn’t worth it if it got Crazy all riled up. Occasionally he glanced over at her. She was always staring at him with that unnervingly steady gaze. He found himself annoyed that he kept looking over, but he could feel her eyes on him and it made him nervous.

“Wouldja stop lookin’ at me like that?” he growled finally.

“Like what?” River said innocently.

“Like you’re readin’ my mind,” Jayne muttered, and River laughed.

“What should I look at you like?”

“Shouldn’t look at me at all,” Jayne replied gruffly.

“I like to look at you,” River said, and slid off her hammock, walking that dancer’s walk to crouch next to him. “You get uncomfortable.” She cocked her head, grinning, and reached out a hand to touch his arm.

He flinched, and immediately felt weaker for it. To prove he wasn’t shy of her touch, he reached out and grabbed her wrists, both of them in one hand. They were so thin that he was afraid he might break her. She didn’t move to free herself.

“You better watch what you say, girlie,” Jayne said in a low voice, refusing to look away from her eyes. “When I’m cooped up in one spot I get edgy, and when I get edgy, I shoot stuff.”

She sat there, completely still, her wrists still trapped in his hand, looking up at him with those big brown doe’s eyes. For a moment there was silence between them. It seemed almost as though she leaned towards him, but perhaps that was just him getting drawn into that dark gaze. Then she spoke, breaking the spell.

“Nothing to do,” she said regretfully. “Who knows how long we’ll be in here?” Jayne released her wrists.

“How should I know?” he asked irritably, and then River’s eyes trailed over his shoulder and lit up. “What?” He turned to look and actually felt his spirits lift.

“Praise God for Kaylee’s inter-engine brewery system,” Jayne said with a relieved grin as he stood. There were three bottles of the stuff tucked behind some box with wires coming out of it, undoubtedly meant to have been hidden, but then, Kaylee wasn’t the most secretive girl by any shot. Jayne doubted if she had ever even told a lie with a straight face.

“Now you’ll be happy,” River said smugly. “Maybe you’ll even sing, if you drink enough of that.” Jayne wouldn’t even allow this barb to get to him. He uncapped the first bottle and came back to sit down next to the engine. He took a long drink and became visibly more cheerful.

“Everything is going to be okay,” River said.

“Now that I have booze it will,” Jayne replied, taking another swig.

“Say,” River said contemplatively. “How does that taste?”

***

“Aaaand if you hafta leave, she saaaaid…don’t forget my siiiiister!”

It was strange hearing River’s guileless soprano voice raised in one of the dirtiest drinking songs Jayne knew, but she’d insisted that he teach her. They were halfway through the second bottle and Jayne was already forgetting why he’d been so worked up in the first place. He was the furthest thing from drunk—it took more than a bottle of wine to go to his head—but he was feeling much more relaxed.

“Ohhh, I left the—“ Jayne began the third verse heartily before realizing that River wasn’t singing along anymore. “Hey, girlie, it’s the verse about the goat! Your favorite!” River didn’t stir, slumped forward like a rag doll. Frowning, Jayne reached out and shook her shoulder. Her head lolled back and she smiled at him dizzily through squinted eyes.

“Like…that one,” River admitted, speech slurred. Jayne had let go of her shoulder and she started to fall backwards. He grabbed hold of her shoulder again quickly—Mal would kill him if she cracked her head open on Serenity’s engine.

“Hey,” Jayne said, suddenly worried. “Stay with me.” She’d been handling herself so well that he’d forgotten she was just a ninety-pound slip of a thing who’d probably never drunk much alcohol before.

River reached for the bottle and Jayne knocked her hand away scoldingly. “No more for you,” he said firmly, and River pouted. If only she could harness the power of that pout, Jayne thought somewhat distantly, she could have every guy in the ‘verse in the palm of her hand.

“Let’s play a game,” River said, only a little fuzzy around the consonants.

“Fine,” Jayne said impatiently, pulling her across the floor to prop her up against a wall. “What do you want to play?”

“How about,” she said slowly, without opening her eyes, “never have I ever?”

“What in the gorramn hell is never have I never?”

“Never have I ever,” River corrected. “We each have one hand, with five fingers.”

“If you’re gonna start spouting about meta-parcels again…”

“Metatarsals,” River said. “But no. We each have five fingers and they’re like strikes. When we get a strike, we put a finger down. Whoever runs out of fingers first loses.”

“How d’you get a strike?”

“Well, say it’s my turn,” River explained. “I might say something like…never have I ever named a firearm.” Jayne looked up sharply and River smirked. “And then you would put a finger down.”

“That doesn’t count,” Jayne said hurriedly, keeping all five of his fingers splayed out. “You were explaining.”

“Fine,” River said, waving a hand negligently. “You want to go first?”

Jayne was skeptical about what sort of game this was, but River seemed relatively more alert than she’d been before, so he settled back against the engine and wrinkled his brow in thought. What had River done that he never had?

“I never—” he started, and River cut him off.

“Never have I ever,” she corrected. Jayne grimaced.

“Fine. Never have I ever…worn a dress!” he said triumphantly. Making a face, River put down a finger.

“My turn.” She peered at Jayne thoughtfully, as though trying to read his face, despite the fact that undoubtedly she could read his mind with no trouble. “Never have I ever…slept with a prostitute.” Jayne cursed under his breath and put down a finger, using his other hand to take a drink. He might be buzzed, but he wasn’t drunk enough to be able to handle losing a stupid game to the crazy girl.

“Never have I ever…” Jayne took another drink while he racked his brains for a way to get her. “…been to school,” he admitted finally, and River looked up at him sharply.

“Never ever?” she asked, and Jayne shrugged.

“Nope. Couldn’t afford it.”

“Education is free under the Alliance,” River said.

“Yeah, but if I weren’t workin’ two jobs, we couldn’t ‘a kept food on the table fer all of us.” Jayne seemed uncomfortable by the turn this conversation was taking. “Put down a finger,” he said gruffly, and River did as she was told.

“Never have I ever gotten a letter from my mother,” River said.

“Never?” Jayne asked, incredulous. “Why, were you never away from home long enough?”

River laughed. It was a harsh, cold sound, unlike her normal, lighthearted laugh, and it shocked him into leaning back from her.

“I was in an Alliance training academy for more than two years,” she said. “I wrote letters home every week at the beginning. I never received a single letter in return.”

Jayne thought about his own mother, and the cunning orange hat she’d made him to keep him warm in his travels. He suddenly felt pity for River, and this made him uncomfortable.

“Never have I ever,” he said quickly, to interrupt the awkward silence, and then realized that he hadn’t thought of what to say. Seeing River’s eyes, still cold and guarded, he lost his train of thought. “Never have I ever met my father,” he blurted out. At first he wasn’t sure why he said it, but when her head came up and her eyes met his, that familiar curiosity sparkling in them again, he didn’t regret it so much.

“Do you know who he is?” River asked, and Jayne shook his head.

“Nope. All ma ever said was he was a no-good lyin’ bastard and he weren’t suited to raise a child. But through all her tough talk, if there’s one thing I know fer sure, it’s that he did the leavin’. Not her.” There was a pensive silence. River was presumably thinking on the idea of not knowing who your own father was. Jayne pretended like he was reflecting on a fatherless childhood, but really he was watching River’s slender hands playing with the fringe on her skirt. He tore his eyes away, feeling inexplicably guilty.

“Never have I ever broken my word,” River whispered, and Jayne’s eyes focused on hers with a sort of panic. She met his gaze unwaveringly and he thought about turning her and Simon in on Ariel. Face burning with shame, Jayne slowly put down a finger. Still holding his gaze, River tucked her own finger down.

For a moment they watched each other, unmoving. Then River spoke quietly.

“Your turn,” she whispered.

“Never have I ever looked down on people poorer ‘n me,” Jayne said firmly. He looked over at River and she was watching him. “You didn’t put down a finger,” he said.

“I know,” River replied. Jayne raised his eyebrows and sat back.

“Never have I ever,” River said softly, keeping her eyes locked on Jayne’s, “been kissed.”


	4. Four

A number of thoughts ran through Jayne’s head, which rarely happened to him. The first was _Hell, if I kiss her, she’ll lose._ The one immediately following was _Hey, I think she wants me to kiss her!_ Then came _Wait a second…this is River. Crazy girl who gored me with a knife._ There were a few other thoughts, too, that weren’t quite so savory.

His eyes flicked up to meet River’s again and his mind went blank. Her big brown eyes that he’d thought so childish before were strikingly adult, long, dark lashes sweeping over them like a veil. Jayne realized that he’d never really looked into a woman’s eyes like this before. Girl. Not a woman, a girl, one part of him argued. When he'd met her, she was a girl. Even if since then, she'd most definitely become a woman. And if she wanted him to kiss her, who was he to turn her down? I mean, he could do the girl a favor. Couldn’t he?

Inexplicably nervous now, Jayne tried to recall her exact wording to see if she had really meant what he thought she meant, but everything had fled his mind except for those liquid eyes and the full little pout below them. River leaned towards him, just the slightest bit, and he saw her tongue moisten her lower lip unconsciously.

Jayne might not be the brightest star in the sky, but if there was one thing he knew, it was when someone was coming onto him. He started to lean towards her when her exact words finally resurfaced in his mind. _Never have I ever…been kissed._

Never? Holy God, the girl wasn’t just a virgin, she was an innocent. He pulled back then, determined to not take advantage of a drunk girl no matter how enticing she was, how soft her lips looked, how enchanting her eyes were, how that dress clung to sweetest and mildest of curves—

Jayne shut his eyes hard against this train of thought and grabbed the almost-empty bottle of hooch. He drained it in a single gulp, ignoring the fire that burned his throat. He opened his eyes to see River, eyes shining with disappointment. The girl may be a super-genius, he thought, but she’s still a girl. And she’s still just been rejected. Jayne set down the bottle and leaned back against the wall, shutting his eyes, exhausted by the whole situation. He wondered if she’d cry. God, he hoped she didn’t cry. Jayne could handle being at gunpoint and being knifed and participating in any and all of the most dangerous jobs in the ‘Verse, but a woman crying made him scareder ‘n a nervous rabbit.

“Didn’t put your finger down,” River said finally, almost inaudibly. Jayne, without opening his eyes for fear of what he might say, shook his head.

“That’s ‘cause I ain’t never been kissed. I’m the one who does the kissin’.”

He heard a soft exhale and only then did he realize he’d just sharpened the sting of her rejection with his words. Gorramit, women were so complicated!

He felt a hand curl around his, tucking his ring finger down under his palm. He opened his mouth to say something and then her mouth was covering his. He opened his eyes in shock and was disconcerted to see that her eyes were open, watching him to see his reaction. After a moment she pulled back.

“Now you have,” River said quietly, releasing his hand and trailing her fingers down his leg on the way back to her lap in a way that she probably didn’t know sent shivers under Jayne’s skin. He took a moment to find his voice again.

“That wasn’t a kiss,” he said finally, and his voice was rougher than he’d expected. God, she hadn’t even moved. It had been like kissing a warm wall, and she had him all riled up.

“Was so,” River shot back defensively, and her lips pulled into that perfect little pout again and Jayne couldn’t stop himself.

He got to his knees, leaned towards her, and took her waist in his hands. She was so small. He pulled her towards him, easily as a doll, and one of his hands came up to tangle in her hair right at the base of her neck and he kissed her. She stiffened at first, unsure, but Jayne brought her close against his body and molded his lips to hers, taking it slow and careful, lips closed, eyes closed. Then her body suddenly yielded under his hands and she melted into him. Her sharp angles disappeared and he felt like he was holding a precious object, something priceless. His hands felt massive and clumsy on her delicate body.

Her lips opened against his and her hot breath rolled into his mouth, wine-flavored, and he opened his eyes and her eyes were finally closed, lids fluttering like she was dreaming, and that was all the permission he needed. He lifted her bodily and stood, setting her on the engine and forcing himself between her thighs so that he could feel her body pressing against his again. Her hands found his chest and she braced herself on him as though she thought she might collapse. Her legs wound around his waist and pulled him closer, and his tongue swept her mouth and he felt her gasp and her whole body shudder. One of her hands snaked upwards and cupped around his neck and she pulled him closer, pressing herself against his body as though she could dissolve into him.

Jayne pulled back then, breaking the kiss and letting go of her so quickly she almost fell off the engine, which hummed and pulsed under her. For a moment she didn’t open her eyes, hands held gracefully in the air as she struggled to catch up to what had happened. Then she opened her eyes, wonderingly, and one hand hovered over her lips as though she was afraid to touch them.

“Oh,” River said faintly.

“That was a kiss,” Jayne said, not a little shakily himself. River swallowed hard and held up her hand, tucking down the final finger.

“I lose,” she whispered.

Jayne opened his mouth to make a witty reply—or say something like “ha,” one of the two—but then footsteps could be heard pounding down the hallway towards the engine room and he heard a shot go stray and Mal’s voice shout a colorful curse directed towards the idiot firing a gun inside his ship. There was a heavy sound as someone released the lock on the engine room and Jayne stood up and grabbed Vera, relieved as all hell to finally get out of this room.

Mal, Kaylee, Inara, and Simon, carrying an unconscious Zoe, piled in through the door and then it was hurriedly slammed shut again and the lock was reengaged.

For a moment there was no sound but the heavy breathing of the four who had just entered the engine room. Then Kaylee said, a little breathlessly, “Why’s it smell like liquor?”


End file.
